This Potty Training Stuff Is For The Birds!

by mommahasapottymouth

Ugh! My daughter will be 4 in December and she still wears diapers at night!! I am sick to death of this! I imagined life with a 3-year-old much differently, to say it nicely.

I thought I had the day time stuff figured out, I really did. Then, last week she started peeing her pants during the day, sometimes right in front of the toilet. I know I know, maybe she just gets too immersed in her play and doesn’t realize it until it is way too late. Well, I am sick to death of that shit!

While I do not believe in punishment for an accident, there is a thin line this little girl is tip toeing on. When I was a little girl, before my momma married my daddy, she was married to this mean son of a bitch. He used to beat the snot outta her. One long night I peed the bed and I remember him grabbing me outta my top bunk and beating my ass. I will never be that kind of parent. But I also get the frustration that comes with this territory.

When my daughter learned to walk ( actually it was running she learned first, and it was at 7 months old) she also learned to take off her diaper. She hated it. Then she learned to pee on the carpet shortly after. We got her a potty seat and she wouldn’t go near it. Then she turned 2, and it was the magical number. My niece Nana was out for a few days and we took the little potty EVERY WHERE! Out side to play? Check! In the living room to watch cartoons? Check! If AM was there, so was her potty. Since we live a fair distance from everything, (grocery stores, the doctor’s office, my parents) we always just put her in a diaper when we left the house. One day my best friend told me to tell her no more diapers in the car, she would have to tell me when she needed to go. It worked. We have never looked back.

But, try as I might, I can not get my girl potty trained for bed. Some mothers brag about they left a diaper off their kid and instantly there was no accidents. Well I can tell y’all that doesn’t work with this kid. Oh, did I mention that she also takes it off in her sleep and climbs into bed with momma and daddy? Yes sir. Then we get peed on. Its great.

I have tried to reason with her. I have tried cutting down liquids at night. I have all together taken away liquids after dinner save a few sips if she is thirsty. I have tried waking her up in the night. What am I missing??? Can it be that my beautiful little daughter will have to remember to put her diaper on before bed on her wedding night???? God save me now!!

If you have kids, and you have conquered this long and frustrating step, do you feel like sharing your knowledge with this helpless momma?? And please save the “Oh my god! My little one did it all on their own!! At 1 years old!!” I could care less, to be honest.

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2 Comments to “This Potty Training Stuff Is For The Birds!”

  1. The same thing happened with my son. He would go #1 fine on the potty, but not #2. Back then, pull up pants were not available. (They were not invented, yet!) It would drive me crazy when he went in his pants and I would have to clean it up. He was 3 almost 4 and by this time he understood most things. What I did was tell him that if he went in his pants he would be grounded from one of his favorite cartoons. I think it was Ninja Turtles. At first I don’t think he believed I would do it, but after he lost the priviledge to watch it a couple of times, he suddenly knew how to go #2. I don’t know if this helps with your daughter, but I thought you’d at least like to know you are not alone. Good luck on the potty training. šŸ™‚

  2. It’s been well over a decade since I’ve done potty training, my son is 16 years-old, but I do remember the frustration. He didn’t get it as soon as I thought he should or as soon as his ‘peers’. Intellectually I understood it wasn’t a contest but somehow I felt like a failure. My mom would brag to me about how I was potty trained at 9 months old! How the bloody hell do you train a 9 month old?! I still have potty issues . . . I’m happy to say that my son doesn’t wear diapers anymore so eventually they do catch on.

    In my opinion the more you push the less you’ll see progress here. Your daughter may be a very heavy sleeper (my son was). And then there is the issue of baby brother and all the attention he’s getting. Dr. Joy Browne always talks about older sibs having trouble with potty training and separation when there’s a baby in the house.

    To lessen the stress on you both get a couple of cheap sleeping bags or ‘bed bags’ and a couple of waterproof mattress covers. Tell your daughter, calmly and matter-of-factually, that she’s going to be 4 in a few months, a big girl, and that she’s ready to manage her own potty time. Let her know that if she wets the bed that she will need to put the bedding into the laundry, she’s in charge. Same with her clothes. Let her know that when she’s ready for big girl sheets that you both will go together and pick them out but until she’s ready it will be a bed bag. Make up a calendar and give her colored stars. For every morning she’s dry, she gets a star, afternoon – a star, and so on. If she wets, no star, no fuss, no negative energy from you about it at all. SHE is in control, SHE places the stars, YOU are calm. You must commit to the pan face. It’s good practice for when she hits adolescence, and believe me you’ll need the practice . . .

    My son went through a stint when he had a few accidents at night when he was about seven. I believe that it was emotional upset, his dad and I divorced when he was 6 1/2. Kids go through stages of development and sometimes it’s two steps back, but the recoup. The best you can do as a parent is to be calm, truly. If you knew me you’d know that was never my demeanor. There were times when I felt the tension rise and I would march out to the deck and let out a big, fat, loud sigh. Sometimes I’d call my sister (she raised four kids) and ask her to talk me through it. Get the support you need to stay calm and keep emotion out of your parenting.

    I know this is hard but truthfully, I do it all again ten times . . . this time goes by in the blink of an eye and then they’re off to their own lives and you wonder why you wasted so much bloody energy being frustrated ; )

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